May 2

Rainfeather... *random "poem" rant again idk*

7 comments

Funny how you should promise to never leave again, to never fall out of touch. To tell us we're your best friends one day, then completely sever any contact with you the next?

 

Irony is so cruel... "I love you all. I will never leave you."

You're convinced we don't care. You're convinced no one cares.

 

You really have absolutely no idea how many tears have fallen from my eyes because of you, do you?

You don't know how many times my heart has shattered for you, do you?

 

You were my best friend. I would have gladly given up my life for you in a heartbeat.

You were more than a friend. You were my sister, despite never meeting you in real life. Please don't leave.

 

If you ever see this, Sophia, know that I'm using your own words against you. Know that we all care. That we're not faking it.

 

Know that I'm so furious with you because you say you're not good enough. I'm fuming because you want to lose the light.

I'm angry because you believe that no matter how many times we tell you you're an amazing, beautiful, smart, kind, nice, caring, cute, friendly, one-of-a-kind best friend you are, you always believe that we're lying, that you aren't, and that you never will be.

 

You, along with so many other people on the MB, were the first person I turned to when I felt depressed, awful, useless, hopeless. You were my soul sister, you were my best friend.

 

x lets out a dry, forced laugh x You know, it's kinda funny... you promised you'd always be there for me, but when I try to be there for you, you turn me away. You turn us away.

 

I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at the you who's convinced nobody cares. That there's no hope left. That nobody can save you.

 

But you have no idea how wrong you are. We all love you, Rain. There are people on the MB who have never even met you who are mourning, because they understand just how much pain we're in.

 

So Rain, if you're reading this now, don't you dare click away. Don't you DARE say "she's just making this up... she doesn't care..." because that's a LIE! You've allowed Lucifer to DECIEVE you.

 

Rain, if you're reading this... please let me know you're still there.

Please come back to me.

PRECISELY. Everyone agrees with this, Rain.

May 2

Ugh, I seriously wish there was something we could do to make sure Rain is okay. It's almost torture knowing that something is wrong, but we can't do anything about it.

Sep 18

take out almost. now you know how I feel.

I'm here now. It really sucks that I can't go back. I'm sorry my mindset is so stubborn, and I'm sorry I can't fulfill your wish loving myself as much as you do. What I do know is that I have a million reasons why I have this hate for myself. That doesn't cut me the slack of leaving you however. Today when I saw you guys were still thinking about me, it hit me. The months you've gone through with this pain I would have never thought someone would receive due to my actions and thoughts really made me think. You were there for me. Yoh always were, and I wasn't. Now I'm back, but I'm afraid I'll be leaving for good. I'm going to be honest, I'm not okay. But I'm not dead. And maybe I wont be dead anytime soon. I'm going to do my best to help myself up when things are at it's worse for you.

 

Now you know I'm going to leave forever, but I'm not going to kill myself I think. Please promise me you'll do the same when I'm gone. I dont want people to hurt because of me and my stupid mind.

Sep 18

you're not stupid or to blame. don't EVER THINK THAT. AND DON'T EVER LEAVE! DONT LEAVE DONT LEAVE DONT LEAVE! EVEN THOUGH I KNOW YOU WON'T BE DEAD, I CAN'T SURVIVE WITHOUT YOU! I've made so many plans - overdose on any pill I find, drinking too much water, secretly getting deathberries from my school - to end it in the past year. all because you weren't here. I love you so much. don't go. please. I can't deal without you. you've become my soul sister, you've made the imprint on my life, and now I can't let you go. hundred year star, I'm seriously crying right now. you're the best of us.

Rain please don't leave us again. I got up this morning, checked my messages, scrolled and scrolled, and there I see a picture of a message that you typed. A message that at first I thought wasn't real, or at least was old, then I decided to check on here and you came back!!! The person I have been so worried about, so scared I would never talk to again. I miss you and hope you can see that we want you to stay.

Sep 18

Please Rain! I rushed onto here the minute Echo saw you and told us on the TGH MB which you should definitely join if you’re allowed to. And I haven’t been on the MB for months. Since April or March or May. We all love you and we’ve been searching for you across the internet, however stalker-ish that sounds. I get that the notifications from here are a bit crazy but the chats on other messaging apps like Hangouts and iMessage, they’re still crazy but they’re easier to use on phone. Heck I’m on my phone using this computer loving website. Please don’t go! If I’ve done any wrongdoing to you, I’m so sorry. We can help you. A lot of use have Wattpad as well. And there is so much new info on everything. We do video calls every now and then (of course you don’t have to join) And sometimes Jennifer is on. Remember when I told you on Roblox? Also yes, we’ve been looking at most of your accounts trying to judge or evaluate wether or not your alive. So Raindeer no, please stay somehow. We all love you forever eternally and until death takes over. A simple check in from time to time would be nice at least. Just so we know you’re okay.

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Art ©2014-2019

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